The one stop shop advice, being thrown around circus tents and modern day sheesha haunts is -- Get. Over. It
The clinical meaning of the phrase and its modern day usage are far removed.
When you're over something- a bad day, a treacherous friend, a relationship gone sour or a random incident -- it is implicit that the 'Thing' (representative of all of the above hereon) is of no difference to you.
Which could be true.
But, getting over things does not imply that it didn't happen, or register. The impact, the car crash has to happen before the recovery can even begin.
The mere collision of the thing is indicative of it shaping you. Maybe in insidious, sub conscious ways.
Maybe a dramatic manifestation of 'that Thing has no power over me' and other such banner-waving declarations.
You're shaped in a stronger mould of who you were, in unknown bits which will make you- the new you in 2014. Even a complete dismissal of the Thing germinates from consideration.
The only way then, to get over something is to ride the wave and dance with tragedy. You figure your best move out of the experience you have had in getting over other past 'Things'. And, as they say, you do what you gotta do.
So, the question begs itself- Are you an assimilation of the past 'Things' you got over? Or is the 'getting over' a misnomer in itself?
Why is so much strength, fortitude and closure ascribed to this act of 'getting over' ?
Tireless energy is spent to ensure that the 'Thing' is rendered meaningless and inconsequential.
But, every minute spent getting over it, is acknowledgement of existence.
It is an acknowledgement of fear.
That you're scared the Thing and its impact on you can kick your ass- hence, the need to overpower it.
Wouldn't acceptance be an easier road to freedom?
"Hello, Thing that scares me senseless.
I see you. I will do nothing.
Maybe, it is the not doing anything that will truly mean getting over it. Like a virus, maybe fighting it will eventually make it immune to your antibiotics.
Maybe, that's what has happened.
We need a plan always.
We need to know our next move- it is the only thing that keeps us going.
Make a plan/ Execute/ Get over Thing#3/ Celebrate your empowerment/ Repeat when Thing#4 shows up
Or, here is an alternative scenario -- Lie still. Quietly.
Let Thing#5 wash over you.
Let it work, let it try.
Like a Judo master- don't defend.
When the storm is over, walk out- without a plan and resume things as they were.
Maybe, I have no idea what I am talking about.
Or, maybe Amis was right, "The truth is Venus, no one really gets over anything."